The Lone Wolf

I don’t know what’s wrong with me.

I follow a lot of runners on teh Twitterz, and I can’t help but notice how much joy so many of them get from finishing a key distance, setting a new PR, or simply getting it done on the road.

I have none of that.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m very pleased with myself when I achieve something as a runner, but I don’t have nearly the emotions that most runners do when it happens. I think the most emotion I’ve ever showed in a race was when I raised my arms in triumph as I crossed the finish line at the Marine Corps Marathon last year.

Maybe it’s because I’m a running loner. I train by myself, I’ve never had a “running partner”, I rarely go to a race with someone (not even my wife and son), and I’m always looking to do better. Maybe it’s because I’m socially awkward, and really dread the thought of being “the new guy” in a large running club, so I do it all alone.

Here’s an example: I go to a race, and run it well. I break my PR, but you wouldn’t know it when I cross the line. I get my water, bagel, and banana, eat it, then get in my car (or get on the Metro) & go home. All the while, focusing on my next training run, my next race, my next goal.

As a “lone wolf”, I train at my paces, and at my distances; everything works for me. I was briefly in a running group last year, and suffered because of my attempt to keep up with a group of much faster runners going distances that weren’t in my training plan. I didn’t want to slow anyone down. I’m sure all of that partially explains my aversion to running clubs and the desire to train on my own.

But sometimes, I just wonder what it’s like to cross the finish line, see a familiar face, and let out a big “Yeahhh!!!” as I crush another PR.

So enjoy it, everyone; bask in it!! Keep celebrating!! One day I hope to join you.